To Look like these Women, You need to BE like these Women
*** A male version of this blog post is coming soon for the guys.
You’re looking through a magazine and think, “How do I get a butt like hers?”
Then you read an article that tells you about the, “5 secret exercises” for a great set of glutes and consider trying them out. After all, they take 5 minutes a day and can be done in your basement, with very little equipment, all while you watch Netflix.
The fitness model in the magazine is interviewed and explains that she does these exercises frequently, while a collage of photos shows her demonstrating the proper technique for each one.
HALF TRUTHS
While she may indeed incorporate those exercises into her workout routine, what is left unsaid is that doing them alone will do almost NOTHING to change your body. In fact, if you decide to take up the 30 day challenge, you’ll most likely end up wasting your time and perhaps feeling a bit worse about yourself because of your “failure.”
The reality is that you couldn’t succeed from the get-go because they weren’t revealing everything you needed to know. Now TECHNICALLY they never said you would look like the model but the underlying assumption is that you would and they knew it.
BEHIND THE CURTAIN
If they were honest about what it would really entail to look like that model, the magazine would lose most of its subscribers or readership. And perhaps that’s our fault as well. Perhaps we want to be deceived, and believe that there is a short cut out there, a life hack that can get us quick results.
Our unconscious and the magazine’s unconscious might have made a deal we all didn’t care to see.
Yes, we all know that those fitness models are insane and workout 8 days a week while eating less than 4 calories/day. In other words, it’s BRUTAL, and who the hell wants to live like they do?
That’s the reality and we look at where we are and where they are and see a chasm between those two points of reference. So, we go back to looking for other ways to get fit in magazines that are happy to tell us what we want to hear.
ADAPTATION – A BETTER WAY
The way to get there, to looking like the woman in the picture above, is to take baby steps. If you went from being sedentary, to eating and working out like that model right away you’d be over trained, sick and light headed. Your body wouldn’t be able to handle all of the changes and demands placed upon it and would protest LOUDLY.
On some level we know this and so when we look at these models we get an imperceptible, negative gut reaction that’s about a nano-second long. That reaction includes all of the revulsion, repulsion and pain that we know we would get if we tried to “be like them.” That’s why we don’t even try. It’s not necessarily laziness.
What we have to do is adapt slowly
- Start by looking ahead at the end goal, of looking like her.
- Decide that you authentically want to get there. Don’t worry about the how, just know that you would like that.
- See the 1001 steps it would take to get there, ACCEPT them but don’t worry about them.
- Now look only at the first few steps that need to be taken. Pick one or two that are EASY for you and start with and are not painful at all.
- Make those first steps a permanent part of your new, daily routine.
- Wait until your body and mind have ADAPTED to them, so that they don’t feel like something new or difficult anymore.
- Take next few steps.
- Keep your eye on the goal.
WHAT THAT MIGHT LOOK LIKE
Example: Megan is a 44 year old woman who has struggled with her weight for years. She sees the picture of the fitness model and wishes, but knows it is out of her reach. Megan reads this blog post and takes action. So, she decides that she will take one 30 minute walk per week, and will substitute half of her sugary desserts for sugar-free ones.
The walk is easy for her and doesn’t feel like such a sacrifice. In fact, she puts on her head phones and enjoys some tunes while she does it, and feels great when she finishes. The dessert change was a piece of cake for her (couldn’t resist). It was easy because she still ate the normal amount of food she normally would, and, importantly, she made sure to make the dessert something she enjoyed. On those nights, she felt a bit better having less sugar in her system, slept better and was still satisfied overall.
After a few weeks Megan got used to this and decided to take a few more steps. This time, she added a few lunges towards the end of her walk and substituted 6 out of 7 desserts, in the same way as before. After a month her legs felt a bit stronger and she felt better at night, even losing 2 pounds.
The weight loss was great but Megan knows better than to watch the scale. She knows to keep her eye on the prize and to continue to put one foot in front of the other, knowing that if she does that well, that the weight will eventually take care of itself.
Megan continues along this path, getting great information from reading this blog and from other trustworthy sources. Over time she adapts to a new reality and is a different person.
Megan never becomes that fitness model, although she knows she could if ever she decided to. Instead Megan is happy to have lost lots of weight and to have toned up her body significantly, and decides that instead she wants to pursue other goals and interests, since a fitness physique requires a bit more of a time commitment than she prefers to put into it.
Megan looks amazing and is a different person than she was both physically and psychologically. Her peers compliment and notice the drastic change, her health has never been better, she looks sexy, and her confidence has never been higher.
All this, because Megan took a patient, long term approach and made sure every step was easy for her.
YOUR GOALS ARE POSSIBLE
The key is to make sure that each day you combine looking at that far off goal, while simultaneously focusing MAINLY on the baby steps. In other words, look at the end goal of looking like a fitness model just once in the morning so you have something to push you forward, and then spend the rest of the day focusing on the baby steps, relaxing and enjoying the day.
Time is going to pass by anyway.
– EatingLove
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